


Starched White Hat

by Adenil



Category: MASH (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-07-03
Updated: 2011-07-03
Packaged: 2017-10-21 00:04:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/218595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Adenil/pseuds/Adenil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Klinger's new outfit is more than a little distracting... Written for the MASHkink challenge.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Starched White Hat

“Is there a problem, Major?”

Charles averted his eyes slightly. “Not at all, Corporal.” He accepted the form Klinger handed him and signed off as quickly as possible. He did his best not to get caught staring a second time as Klinger sashayed away.

But really, it was impossible not to stare. Charles had been staring for weeks, ever since Klinger had taken to wearing the bright white nurses uniform. It had been a sort of compromise—Potter was just happy to see Klinger in some kind of uniform, and Klinger was just happy he could still claim he was crazy once a week. Charles, on the other hand, was not happy with the current situation.

The problem, he thought to himself as he leaned back in his chair and surveyed the recuperating patients, was that the slim uniform just wasn't made for a man. Despite all the alterations Klinger had done to the formerly-curvy outfit, it still clung to his form like a second skin. The cotton moved tight against Klinger's body as he walked, bending and swaying with each step. It outlined every inch of his flat chest and thin waist, and left nothing to wonder about below the belt.

Charles was sure that a nurse's uniform should not be that obscenely tight.

He watched Klinger slip in between the rows of cots. He leaned lightly against the bed post and cocked his hip at a jaunty angle. His position gave Charles a clear picture of his backside, and for a moment he wondered when Klinger had taken off his high heels. Without them his legs and ass took on a different, more natural shape.

Charles felt a little cold as he realized that he was comparing Klinger's ass sans-high heels to the perfect picture in his head of Klinger with them. He could clearly see Klinger—without the dainty sensibilities of a lady proper—bending to pick up a fallen pencil and giving the OR a clear view (even if Charles had been the only one looking at the time).

With a start, he realized he had been admiring the Corporal for nearly ten minutes. It was unseemly. He had work to do and shouldn't be letting his eyes wander, let alone to Klinger a man.

He was about to drag himself back to his work when one of the few patients who was still awake reached his hand towards Klinger. Charles knew what his intentions were almost before the patient had completed the action—he would have pinched that butt, too.

Klinger whirled around and slapped the offending hand away. In the same instant Charles stood and crossed the room to grab Klinger by the elbow before he could say anything.

“C'mon, Major, let me show him what he's dealing with...”

Charles ignored Klinger's words as he dragged him through the back rooms to the empty lab. As he turned around he realized that he wasn't even sure what he was going to say to Klinger. He had mostly whisked him away out of jealousy, but he certainly couldn't say that.

Klinger stumbled as Charles released his arm. His sharply-pressed nurses hat slipped from its pins. With a start, Charles reached forward and grabbed it before it could tumble to the ground.

They both stared at the thin white hat. “Oh,” Klinger breathed. He glanced up through thoroughly mussed hair to fix Charles with his steady gaze, and somehow that was what broke the tension.

Charles stepped forward and he wasn't sure if he dropped the hat or just crumpled it between them as he slid one hand around Klinger's waist and cupped his chin with the other. He brought their lips together in one single, desperate kiss which never broke as Klinger seamlessly wrapped his arms around Charles' neck and pulled him close.

With a groan Charles pressed Klinger into the wall behind him. He felt his body work on its own to get as much skin-to-skin contact as possible. He slid his leg between Klinger's spread thighs and marveled as the short skirt helpfully raised itself to bunch high on his hips.

Klinger leaned back with a gasp as Charles ran his hand along the hem of his skirt across the skin of his bare leg. “I should be minding the patients,” Charles said absently.

“Uh-huh,” Klinger returned, but he was already struggling to unbutton Charles' shirt and Charles had already reached up under his skirt. He kissed around Klinger's gasps of pleasure as he started stroking him, and the room dissolved into quiet moans and desperate, thrusting hips.

It was probably a good thing he was mostly bald, Charles thought later as he tried to button his shirt with unconscious fingers. It meant less hair for Klinger to mess up.

Charles was still struggling with his open shirt as Klinger stood and deftly tugged down the hem of his dress, suddenly looking presentable again. With a cheeky grin he donned his well-starched hat again and draped a hand over his narrow hip. Charles realized he had been trying to button the same wrong buttons the whole time.

“Klinger,” he said evenly. “That nurses uniform is not appropriate. You shouldn't wear it any more.”

“Really?” Klinger didn't seem too impressed with him, no doubt because his shirt and pants were still hanging open. “Well, how about after this shift you come back to my tent and see if you can... talk me out of it?”

Charles thought that was the best idea he'd heard all year.


End file.
